In Vacant or in Pensive Mood

Early mornings for me have always been about last-minute studying during exams, finishing assignments or catching flights - always about something to do, often to be done in a hurry. Even when my daily commute to college or work took 2+ hours, I wouldn't wake up until the last possible minute. Even after waking up, on most mornings, my dad would find me dozing off in front of the cupboard midway through finding something to wear. Well, you get the drift! During the 2021 lockdown, for the first time ever, I woke up early with no urgent agenda. No, it wasn't part of a resolution of any kind. I don't remember the reason now, but exactly on the 1st of June, I happened to wake up at 4:45 am. I got out of bed, not wanting to wake my husband, tiptoed out of the room and shut the door carefully behind me. Once outside the bedroom and away from the whirring of the ceiling fan, I felt the still calm of the morning wash over me. My heart wasn't beating fast out of the anxiety of a...

Since the time I remember, I've always been one of those persons who lived far away. When I was a kid, my home was only about 5 kms from school, but when compared to the other kids who could just walk up to school in a matter of 5 minutes, I lived far away. As I grew up over the years, the distance I've had to travel on a regular basis has also progressively grown. I did my Bachelor's degree in a place about 10 kms from my home, my first job was a little farther, and the college where I did my Master's degree a bit more. Well, you get the picture! It has never been far enough to stay in a hostel, but it has always been quite a time-consuming commute. Now, I travel roughly about 45 kilometres every day in my commute between home and work. Sometimes, I choose to ride my two-wheeler, sometimes I choose to travel by public transport. Either way, my journey is long enough for my mind to sink in and get lost in a world of thoughts. I have found that these journ...

Growing up is a huge responsibility. When we were children, we were just waiting to grow up and go to work! We thought that life was easier for our parents and the other adults we knew because they had no homework to worry about when they got back from work. We associated school to torture when we compared them with our childish imaginations of adult life. And, although some of us did say that we wanted to become doctors or teachers when we grew up, the span of our imaginations could not be limited to those few words put into our heads by adults. Take, for example, what my little sister used to say she wanted to be when she grew up; “Haaayah” , her version of Aayah , a name we use for maids who clean, and help the teachers in the kindergarten. She also used to claim that her Haayah was her best friend! My little cousin once said he wanted to be a lorry (truck) driver. What simple, uncomplicated wishes they were, very unlike the clichéd aspirations we were expected to possess. ...

Two months ago, on 20 th February 2014, Alan Joash Samuel, our dear friend and classmate, passed away due to Rabies. The weeks that preceded it, and those that followed, have been the toughest phase of my life, emotionally. I tried to write, but I wasn’t in a state of mind to blog about it. Now that I am back here after a long break from blogging, I feel that it would be unjust if I don’t record the event that impacted my life in such a big way. So, I’m putting together here what I wrote at different points during the last two months. It’s been over a week from that dismal day, yet our hearts refuse to be comforted. His sudden and unexpected death has left us all shattered. We didn't get a chance to tell him how much he meant to us, how precious his role in influencing our lives. W e didn’t have the time to bid him goodbye. Even though my mind is still fogged by the sorrow weighing my heart down, I now recollect the events of the past few months. In late October 2013,...

“It’s kinda funny how life can change. Can flip 180 in a matter of days...” - BLUE Our life is a journey, and it is what we make it to be. We draw up a course for ourselves; deciding, planning, contemplating, and taking determined steps into the future. But sometimes, life chooses to make changes on its own. Once in a while, it alters its course from the usual, and decides to take an unexpected turn. These changes break our mundane routines, and come as pleasant or unpleasant surprises. Either way, an unexpected challenge or change thrown at us by life causes us some excitement, urges us to be creative, and teaches us to think on our feet. Sometimes these changes are welcoming, but sometimes we don’t know what it has in store for us. Such was my opportunity to be associated with a multinational IT company. I was a student from a humanist stream of study, and I strongly believed against the IT industry. I disliked everything I knew about this industry; the centralised air-condi...