In Vacant or in Pensive Mood

The 5:30 am scheduled alarm on my phone went off. Trained by routine, my hand extended out in the direction of the “...” music, picked up the phone and brought it to my face. I squinted open half an eye, just enough of a slit between the lids for me to spot the “Dismiss” icon. Alarm dismissed, I read the date displayed on the home screen; 21/10/15 –my Wednesday morning had officially begun. Throwing my phone aside, I slipped back into a state of semi-consciousness, trying to find the location in my mind where I had left off a dream in progress. My senses soon connected with the dream, in an inevitable motion. In the dream, I watched myself resigning the job I now hold, to go away and live with my grandparents in their home in Kerala. The rude interruption of my second alarm jolts me out of the pleasant green mountains, and teleports me back to my bed. I sit up on my bed, in awe of my dream! I loved the idea of quitting my job and going to live with my grandparents for a while....

Spotify recommended this song  (Always" by Armaan Malik and Calum Scott) to me a couple of days back. I had never heard it before but, strangely, it made me nostalgic. Maybe they don't write songs like this anymore, maybe it was because I was playing it on loop for my daughter during her nap... whatever the reason, it took me back. Back to a time when we said these things to each other. When we spoke in absolutes. When we made absolute promises. "Always." "Forever." "All my days. All my nights." We were newly in love, but we were so sure! Oh, it was a time when we needed nothing else, and nobody else. This person was our everything.   We just floated through life, everything and everyone else a blur. Eyes focussed only on that one person. Only their opinion mattered. Only their feelings were important. And, of course, their presence. What a time it was, when the only thing we expected from each other was presence! No words, no actions, no demands....